I Do Not Understand Reality, Special “Scent Elves” Edition, 26 July 2012

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Good Afternoon:

I have zero product loyalty to deodorants.

There. I said it. Do your worst, Mad Men of Madison Avenue; I don’t care what product I use to slime my armpits. I buy whatever I see on special on the shelf without any concern about the brand itself. However, I might have to change my mind and shun one company that shall remain unnamed because of what the label reads on back:

“CONTAINS: Odor-fighting ‘atomic robots’ that ‘shoot lasers’ at your ‘stench monsters’ and replaces them with fresh, clean, masculine ‘scent elves.'”

I am not making this up.

Vonn Scott Bair

PS–Has anyone spotted the grammatical error?

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