The English Bulldog vs. The American Skateboard!

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Good Evening:

You can call nothing about the English Bulldog average. Either the smallest large breed of dog or the largest small breed of dog–it is not average sized–Bullies have a unique (to put it mildly) physique that makes them a uniquely suited breed for a uniquely American activity.

Skateboarding.

Only the English Bulldog has the combination of a low center of gravity, compact muscular build, and sheer weight that enables them to use the skateboard successfully. A quick search of “Tyson skateboard bulldog” or “Tillman skateboard bulldog” will turn up hundreds of pictures and videos of famous English Bulldogs demonstrating their skills to crowds of admiring and/or laughing humans. In other words, a good skateboarding bulldog can provide a secondary or even primary source of income for its favorite human.

Hence, this bulldog and his favorite human at the San Francisco Civic Center.

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This human has tried for a long time to teach his master canine to skateboard. However, progress has not come easily, if at all. I wrote that nothing about an English Bulldog is average, and that includes their “intelligence:” they are the dumbest breed of domestic canine in the world, with only the Basenji and the Bloodhound coming close (and at least the Bloodhound can state that its testimony is accepted in a court of law).

This particular bulldog prefers to bark at its board. To do that, it first needs to prevent the board from rolling away…

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…so it flips his board upside-down.

Now the dog can flip it back over, and does, but he does not ride it. He pushes his skateboard–without looking where he pushes it…

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…as my right ankle found out the hard way one-quarter second after I took this shot. No harm done; anyway, I can forgive an English Bulldog anything. Incidentally, did you notice that his mouth is also much larger than average?

I know the human won’t give up trying, but this day’s training ended after about 15 minutes…

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…and they walked off into the figurative sunset.

Vonn Scott Bair

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6 responses »

    • Alana: Thanks, it’s probably my best photo of the month. It captures the crazed obsessed delight in the eyes of a bulldog as it engages in its favorite activity. My family had one bulldog, Archy, who was obsessed with catching birds. He was partially lame in both hind legs, so that never went well. Another one, Robert, was obsessed with catching skunks. He fared even worse, and so did we. Vonn Scott Bair

      • Vonn Scott Bair, you make me smile. Thank you for stopping by me blog, having a good look around and responding with such enthusiasm.

        I feel for Archy, I too enjoy partaking in activities I’m not very good at…but Robert is on his own, he should’ve learned from his mistakes. 😉

      • Alana: I always feel glad to my visitors smile. As for Robert, well, ’tis the nature of English Bulldogs that they don’t learn from their mistakes. Fortunately, they are loyal and adorable–who could not like a face like that? Vonn Scott Bair

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